Man Bag Mania!

We've all had a good laugh at Beast's grubby little man bag, a rather sad affair - stuffed with items he treasures. It reminded me of a bag left in the school changing room that no-one would claim, not even worth nicking.

Well lets have a look at my bag, in a different league for sure. It's a "Shilton", a by-word for quality for "people in the know".

Would you like to see the contents? Of course you would!
Well, from left to right we have:-

A fun size box of "Curiously cinnamon Cereal" - an essential if your blood sugar level starts dropping.

A can of Stella Artois, Frobi's favourite lager. Again an essential to prevent dehydration.

My Colt Shower Shot attachment. As it says on the box "This water accessory easily installs onto any standard shower for an incredible burst of ater pleasure and cleansing sensation. Soft, Jelly dong screws into the chrome flex hose for a secure mount. Unscrew shower head. Add washers to prevent water leak and screw in hose." This is an essential bit of kit, people still talk of my impression of the Trevi fountain in Rome when I hooked it up to the power shower in the changing rooms of the David Lloyd Sports Centre and shot artistic jets of water out of my mouth!

Red hankie ;-)

Johnsons Baby light oil spray, to give me a sultry glow.

Leather cock strap to keep everything up together and give that "bulge appeal" that women like so much. The male equivalent of a push up bra.

A pink Vivienne Westwood "Fuck your Mother" t-shirt, always a head turner!

Hemp Body Butter, great for dry skin! and smells divine - but I keep getting followed home by hippies.

"Fuckin Criminal" Boxer Shorts (30" waist). Worn with low-slung jeans ala Hip-Hop.

Pro-Sport Jock Strap, well you never know when your going to be invited to a Underwear party!

Roll-on deodorant - we here at frobishersfunpages spurn aerosols cause of the damage to the planet.

Hollow Rubber pipe weighted with lead at one end. Because of all the nutters out there! You gotta look after yourself.

Black balaclava.

Wet wipes.

Machismo magazine - Latino Bad Boy Issue! The Worlds #1 Latino Sex Magazine.

Blackout Eye Pads.

Skipping Rope - for those impromptu work-outs - wherever you might be.

2 packets of king size rolling papers (pure hemp of course) with an eight of Red Lebanese Hash and a quarter ounce of sticky black Afghan cream hash (personal - for medical reasons, my Social Anxiety Disorder).

A big fat wallet stuffed with money and a few sweeties.

You've all been MeMe'd - lets see what ya got in yourbags!